There is nothing wrong with having another baby shower. She's on her second preg and having a baby shower for this preg is fair. A baby is shower is for THAT baby or preg. It shouldn't not be limited to just one a lifetime. It's to give the mother support during this important time in her life and to help with the needs for the child/children. Shoot...bless that woman with a baby shower! :D
Your aunt is right that usually a shower is held just for the first child since you can continue to use those items. However, I see nothing wrong with having a shower that replaces items that get used up: diapers, onesies, practical items not cutesy items.
I think you should throw her another baby shower. If your aunt does not want to go then she does not have to go. I agree that all babies should be celebrated!!
I'd have to agree with your aunt, repeated baby showers aren't 'required' nor should they be 'expected'. The first shower is for the 'women' to get together and share stories, gifts, and advice with the mom-to-be. Giving gifts that helped them. Parents who think that their decision to add to their family and have others help accommodate that decision are a tad bit selfish. The pending arrival of twins puts a new spin on things, but Mom and Dad know what is needed and should have been buying and accumulating supplies as soon as they knew. Friends and family will, no doubt, give the babies gifts once they get here, but there is no excuse for Mom and Dad not knowing and getting the things they need. You never know what gifts you will receive, and I always treated gifts like frosting and sprinkles on the cupcake. I made sure I had all that was needed, anything I received was an extra, not a necessity. I never gave away any of my baby clothes from the first and second child until I was done having my third. Hand-me-downs between babies and kids is a way of life, kids outgrow before they wear out the vast majority of their clothes and toys. Take good care of things.
But a shower for every baby is just selfish on the Mom's part, sorry. Many people give gifts once the baby arrives and/or at baptism. If you know of something your sister needs and can't afford, you can give her that item, that gift without the shower. When the twins arrive, you can come babysit or take the older sibling out for a trip while Mom gets some one on two time with the twins, or you sit with the twins while she takes the older child out for their one on one time. The gifts of time once those babies arrive will be far more important than anything you can put in a gift bag or tie a ribbon around.
I think it would be a great gesture on your part to go ahead and throw her another. Many women have a babyshower per pregnancy, especially if they are spread out a little and/or a multiple pregnancy. If it makes you feel a little better, you can have it right after the babies are born that way its more of a "meet the new babies" party. I had 2 showers that were after I had my child, and it was so much fun to show off the new addition. Another suggestion is to ask around to see if anybody has the major things that arent being used that she can borrow/have. I know there are certain things that will have to be prchased.
Congrats to you onyour twin nieces/nephews, and to you sister!!
My neighbors threw a babyshower for me when I was expecting my third daughter. My other two at the time were 4 and 2 years old. I pretty much had everything I needed with the exception of a few things that I bought. I told them they did not need to do this but THEY were the was that insisted. The shower actually centered around me. Most of the gifts were for me. They all went in together and bought we two weeks of premade dinners. I can't tell you how much I really needed that. Anyway, you have to remember showers are not only for the mom and baby but for others to show you their love and sometimes this is the only way they can offer help to a new mom. I've never carried twins but I've been preganat for way too many months, your sister deserves the party of a lifetime!
I absolutely felt the same way your sister did, I was having a girl the second time and felt that less people were excited or celebrating her arrival. I consider a shower more than gifts ( I didnt' even want gifts at the shower) it's about celebrating the arrival of a baby. I had so many cards/gifts for my first baby and felt bad that i had nothing for my second- I wanted her to have something in her scrapbook of people excited about her arrival. With your sister having twins it's even more necessary for her to have help..you can always do something like a "bottoms only" shower theme--have people bring diapers, diaper creme, wipes maybe they will feel it's more of something she needs and can use instead of clothes.
Back East, we do second showers, however they call them "Diaper Showers" so that people bring the things needed most, like tons of diapers. Of course, other stuff is brought to the expecting mother as well, but mostly diapers of all sizes. This is a celebration, without calling it a "Baby Shower"
That being said, I've also seen people throw "Twin showers" when the parents are expecing their first set of twins, regardless of when those twins come into the family. It's different kind of celebration, with two of everything being highlighted.
Good Luck
I'm kind of in the middle on this because I never believed in second baby showers, but then got pregnant with twins on my second and friends decided to throw a shower for me. But what I requested was that people give me second-hand stuff. I had one of everything so people donated a second bouncy chair, crib, high chair, swing, etc. It was great. I also got tonnes of second-hand clothing as even though I'd had a boy and the twins are boys they were born at different times of the year and I wouldn't have had enough for two babies. Some very generous people also gave me gift cards for Babies R Us, which was helpful as I had to buy extra everything. So, if your sister wants a second shower, but your aunt feels put out, why not have your aunt find some second-hand stuff to donate or go to a thrift shop and buy something and give your sister a shower. She may be overwhelmed by the thought of having two babies and the money it is going to cost to get the extra stuff!
I have three sisters and between us we shared a close group of about 10 other girlfriends. Whenever any of us had babies (we've all had at least three)we wanted to give gifts and celebrate the new addition to the family. Knowing that we were each going to do this, we made an event out of it by (usually) getting together on a weekday afternoon at a restaurant we all enjoyed that we knew would be quiet. We ordered a couple pies to split and each bought her own beverage. Then we just visited, passed around babies, and watched our dear friend open gifts and know that she was loved and supported by us all. Sometimes this was before the baby and sometimes it was after - whatever worked best with everyone's schedules. But there was no thought of selfishness by the mom or any reluctance to give!
I use past tense because this was a few years ago in Wisconsin. I moved here and miss attending those "showers" so much!! I had my third daughter after I moved here, and I didn't need any thing, but I really wished I could have had that time with my girlfriends again to celebrate.
Don't miss your opportunity to give a wonderful experience to your sister, and if calling it a "shower" is the problem, then don't! Just invite everyone to a get-together and if they "happen" to bring her a gift, well that's okay! ;)
I don't see anything wrong with having a second baby shower. My sister in law was given two showers for her second child by family and friends. A co-worker just had her third, this time a girl and we gave her one. I think the purpose is to celebrate the new life coming into the world and help the parents get the things they need. I would absolutely throw her a baby shower and those that feel its wrong or don't want to participate don't have to come. =)
A second baby shower is fine. I did not have one with my 2nd(my son) because I really didn't need much and I figured why spend money on a shower when I/they could spend that cake,etc. money on baby stuff instead. In reality most of the pople you know will bring a gift to the hospital or your house for the baby. So, what's the difference if the gift is recieved there or at a shower? I guess it depends on if the mom wants a shower. At a second baby shower the mom should expect that the gifts will be much less as most of the big items are already bought. Also, people coming to a second shower should not be obligated to sepnd ridiculous amounts of money, an outfit or two is nice to recieve and inexpensive.
I used to think it was in appropriate to have a second, but have since changed my mind. My sister's group of friends figure that if there is a group of women that are going to give gifts anyway, why not get together to do that and celebrate? I completely agree and now go along with that reasoning!! Who doesn't love an excuse to get together with your girlfriends?? And celebrating a new baby at the same time is even better! I say go for it, especially since it's twins and if she's asked for it. There's no reason not to spoil an expectant mom!!!
If you have two or three kids then I think a shower is great for each one. If you have more than three or plan to then I like the idea of meet the baby type of showers. Regardless how many kids one has I do believe that each one should be celebrated equally.
no cus it's celebrating the new birth of the little one. I have had a baby shower with each kid, I have had them after the baby is born cus I figure it's a babyshower.. So the baby should be there, and that way everyone can see the little one too. Also I never found out what i was having soo.. Had to have new stuff, and I didnt keep every article of clothing from my first boy to my girl to my baby boy now.. cus each kid is differnt. For instance my first baby was 5lbs 11oz and his baby brother was born 8lbs 1oz big difference in clothes!!! Baby showers are a celebration of a new life. and just cus she has had one kid that baby shower doesn't cross over to the other child, it would be like using one baby book for all your kids and saying well you weren't important enough to have your own book...
Every baby should be celebrated for sure! You don't want any children that come after the first baby to think they weren't equally important as that first child. I have three kids and I had a shower for each one. The shower for the third was very low key and just close friends/family. I would think especially with twins she would need a shower...two of everything?! Best wishes and good luck to your sister and to you becoming an auntie again! :)
I say go for it! Have another shower w/ close family and friends. I had a shower for my first and second and both are girls. I didn't do it for gifts, I just wanted to celebrate the 2nd child as much as the first. I think close family and friends will undwestand and want to celebrate. Especially since she does need more stuff for twins! You can word it in the invitation such that you focus on the celebration of the babies.
Is it wrong to welcome a new baby, in this case, two new babies, into the world? OF COURSE NOT!! We need more traditions and celebrations in families! The aunt seems rigid. "Not right?" I just don't understand this thinking. I was blessed with friends who gave me showers with each of my pregnancies, even #4 daughter, who everyone warned would be left out of everything. Not so! We celebrated all babies, additions, changes, and transitions in our family!
I think that your sister is right to want to clebrate every baby. The invitations can say "no gift necessary," if she feels that is appropriate, but why not have a party? And people who don't think that it is appropriate don't have to come.
it's fine to have a baby shower for subsequent babies. If you aunt doesn't want to be bothered then leave her off the invite list.