My sister is in the middle of her second pregnancy (this time twins) and she wants to have another baby shower. I understand why, this time she's having twins and she doesn't have everything she needs, she says that her reason is because she wants to celebrate every baby with a baby shower. But my aunt says that she already had one and it's not right to have another. I was just hoping to get a few more point of views.
I had a shower for both my kids. I did get some flack from family and some aunts and cousins didnt come. I did it because I had a girl first and then a boy and I didnt have anything for a boy so it was a small shower since I already had the big baby stuff. I would say go for it...especially since shes having twins, she will need all she can get! good luck
I have only ever attended showers at work and we do throw a shower for every pregnant woman, no matter if it's her first or fourth child.
I personally think it's okay. People who feel that it's tacky always have the option of RSVPing with :"Sorry but we won't be able to attend."
In the old days they use to olny give one baby shower period. Come on this is 2009. I thinks it's great to give every baby a shower. I have 2 children and I was giving a baby shower for each one. There is nothing wrong with giving a baby shower for every pregnancy. I would say give your sister the baby shower and if your Aunt doesn't feel right about it...Sorry but don't come...Not trying to sound rude...
Good heavenly days--- your aunt needs a tonic. ( that's an oldfashioned remedy for being in a rotten mood) Your sister has NOT already had twins. Twins are unique- and every single baby that comes into this world deserves a few nice, new-- bright and shiney things PLUS deserves to be rejoiced in before they arrive--- GREAT JUMPING Jehosaphat.
I'm old, too ( well-- 64 at any rate) --- but have a party-- rejoice- play silly games and give your sister a smile -- . Tell auntie I said so ( she wont' care--- but you and I do)
Blessings,
Judy- aka- Old Mom
Every child is a blessing and should be celebrated!
We had a shower for my SIL for her 3rd boy. The gifts were not large but they still needed things such as clothes (the 2nd spit up and ruined alot of the old ones) and diapers and it is always nice for each kid to have thier own things. If people do not want to give a gift then that is their choice. Tell your aunt that you understand her position about gifts but you would still appreciate her coming to support her neice on a new adventure with having twins.
Good luck and enjoy the new babies!
No I don't feel it is wrong wanting to have another baby shower. I feel each pregnancy is a pure joy and miracle and should be treated as the same of any previous pregnancies.
Terry
Honestly, I've never known someone NOT to have one, even for a fourth baby. My husband's work planned a surprise one for my second child (though they made the day too late, and I had him the day before, so Richard was caught at the party!).
Even if 2nd and 3rd showers were not the norm (and in my experience, they are), twins create a completely different set of valid reasons for one.
I wouldn't sweat it. If you get pregnant again, you will likely have a group of friends throw you at least a small baby shower.
I think every child should be REJOICED over! In our family (we have a big family) we have had showers for every baby born whether it was the 1st or 5th child! Your aunt should relax. Children are a gift from God!
Mary
I don't see a problem with wanting a shower for each baby. After all, things get stained and worn out, and babies come in different genders, so it makes sense to prepare for each one individually. And twins are a special circumstance. They require a lot more stuff and a lot more work, and the mother of twins is going to need all the encouragement she can get.
I'm currently pregnant with my second and absolutely expect to have a shower (or "sprinkle" - lighter version of a shower). I think every one is entitled to their opinion about whether or not it's necessary, but the idea of a baby shower is not to "get presents", it's to celebrate the upcoming baby's birth with a celebration with family and friends.
There can always be a no gift rule or have everyone only bring an item of clothing - especially if new babe is a different gender than #2. I've also seen where guests contribute to a "pot" so that the upcoming parents can get a large gift that they really need like a double-stroller.
I just think it's such a great way to commemorate the beginning of a new life and the pictures and memories are so important for the kids too as they grow up!
Ultimately, I think it's the choice of the parents, not the family and everyone should respect their decision. If your aunt doesn't agree, she doesn't have to come and enjoy the fun!
I also have twins with an older child, and I had a baby shower both times. Even though I had a lot of baby stuff, it was really a hardship to buy everything I needed for twins. It's like shopping for a baby all over again, especially difficult since the furniture and carsearts are so expensive (and most people aren't counting on buying all that stuff the second time around). I used everything I got at the babyshower and I wouldn't know what I would have done without it! I definately don't see a problem having a baby shower in this case, but I have also known people who have had two and three baby showers for just one baby! I think it's no big deal, and the people who are against it don't have to come if they don't want to! ONe thing to think about,though, is that she will probably want lots of help from friends and family later on with the two babies, so you don't want them to feel like they are being asked to do too much, or put them in a place where they don't want to help in the future. I would consider that if lots of friends and family are feeling negative about it, but not so much if it's just one person. Just a thought, hope that helps!
No. I also had twins during my second pregnancy - now almost 7 y.o. - I didn't ask/expect one but my friends threw one for me. Twins are a whole different ballgame. Depending on the age of the older child don't forget them. Many friends gave gifts to the big sis for becoming one. It is also nice to give future gifts of time - either w/older child or babies, meals, visiting so new mom can take a shower all these are gifts. So, I'm all for a party.
In the 'olden days' you used to have just one baby shower for your first born. (My own mom-in-law is a huge stickler on this one.) But that idea has changed! Moms today want to celebrate each child. And as everyone has mentioned so far... each baby is a different circumstance and worth celebrating :) So, I say, change with the times people! No one wants to stick with out dated ideas, unless you're a big fan of things like corsets, not wearing white after labor day, etc...! Enjoy the shower and have fun :)
I am pregnant with my second child and am having a shower. I havea 4 1/2 year old son and am now having a girl. It's a bit uncomfortable for me to have the shower, but, there are some things that I really do need. I kept a lot of stuff, but other stuff is worn out, or not safe anymore (like my bottles were pre BPA-free). I think that celebrating the birth of a baby is always a good reason for a party and there's nothing wrong with that - if there are things your sister needs, she can register for them...I have to wonder, is your aunt not going to buy a gift because it's your sister's 2nd pregnancy? I doubt it :-)
I don't think it's wrong at all. I could maybe see if her baby is only 9mo old or something, but even then I still think it's ok- you get things at baby showers that aren't reusable, plus if they are close enough together she could be using things still for the first baby and need another item for the second. I definately think it's a necessity due to the fact that she's having twins this time. I hope this helps!
I agree with your sister. You should celebrate every child and that is the reason for having a baby shower. If your Aunt raises a stink then politly let her know that she doesn't have to join you in the celebration of your new family members. We had a shower for our second child and for something different my sister-in-law invited the hubbies, it was a blast watching them play all the games and they had a great time. Have fun! :)
Most of my friends, including myself, have been having 2nd and even 3rd baby showers. I agree that each pregnancy and baby is an awesome event that needs to be celebrated! For me, the first time was a fairly big event, and even had a "work" one and a "family/friends" one. The second time around was a smaller event with a group of close friends. I say go for it!
Every child is a blessing and should be celebrated. :-)
I had a beby shower for my first child and had three miscarriages after that. After my third miscarriage I gave away all my baby stuff, then of course, a few months later I was again pregnant. I did not ask for a shower but my mother staunchly opposed anyone suggesting a shower for me - I had one and it was not proper etiquette to have one for a second child. It would have been great to have another since I had given everything away.
Personally, I agree with celebrating every baby as you celebrated the first and different circumstances call for different things.
With the expectation of twins, a shower is a good idea, even if it is not the first baby.
I have seen other options to help out a moms who are not having their first child that are really helpful.
My sister had a baby sprinkle. It was not an all out shower and since she had all the big stuff she needed already from her first child, her friends bought clothes (which was helpful since the new baby was a girl and her first was a boy), diapers , small toys , etc. They were able to get together and celebrate the new baby in the same way but it was still a celebration and helped my sister out immensly.
Something we did for a friend on her fourth child (especially helpful since her third was still in diapers) was a diaper drive. She obviously had everything she needed forthe new baby, including clothes, so we celebrated this new baby with food and fellowship and instead of everyone buying different things, everyone came with a package of diapers. Since diapers are an expesive consumable commodity and you can really never have too many diapers this was a great help.
It is never wrong to celebrate a new baby and the 4th, 6th , 10th child is worthy of just as much celebration and joy as the first- there are creative ways to celebrate without going overboard or seeming greedy (obviously a new crib is not needed for every new baby) so there is nothing wrong with a 'no gifts' shower, a cap on the expense of the gift shower or one steered towards a particular item, like diapers. I have even seen couples who have or are able to get everything they need for he new baby have a shower where they asked the gifts be donated to orphans/ children in need or battered womens shelters.