My step-daughter is having her first child soon and does not have a good relationship with the father of her child and they are not married. I was wondering if there were any special laws in the state of Texas regarding which surname the baby takes and what kinds of pros/cons are involved.
Not sure about the law, but I can tell you my experience. My son's dad and I were very much a couple but we were not married. When my son was born we filled out all the paperwork giving him his dad's last name. A few weeks later when we received the copy of his birth certificate and social security card it had MY last name for my son. Whe I called to find out why this happened when I clearly requested his dad's last name, I was told that the father needed to fill out an acknowledgement of paternity form. Without the form, if the parents are unmarried, the child will automatically be given the mother's last name. We filled out the appropriate form and sent it in and his name was corrected. Hope this helps.
When I had my first baby, I wasn't married but I was living with her dad--my now husband. He did have to sign and acknowledge that she was his. Most men don't have a problem with this IF they are on good terms or are in a relationship with the mom. If not, he might want a paternity test. She REALLY needs to talk to the father about this just to see how he feels about it. Good luck!
There are no laws regarding this issue, she can give the child whatever last name she wants...she doesn't even have to list him as a father!
I was 16 when I got pregnant with my first child, the father and I no longer spoke except when I called him to update him on the pregnancy. When she was born I gave her my last name and didn't even list him on the birth certificate. I am now married and my husband legally adopted her. We had to contact the father, get his approval (he approved cause he didn't want her or want to pay child support...sad, men can be pigs), he had to sign an acknowledgment of paternity, and a relinquishment of rights and then we went before the judge and it was a done deal. Now she has my husbands last name.
However if she lists another man as the father, knowing that it is not true...she can get into aloooot of trouble. But she can give the baby her last name or the fathers, at her choosing. Congrats on the grandbaby!!
You've gotten some very accurate answers and I just wanted to add that she doesn't even have to give the baby her last name or his last name, she can choose any last name that she wants.
I was married but separated when i had my youngest. I was only married(under the same roof) for 3 months and hadn't heard from the father since. I really did not want my baby to have his father's last name but my attorney advised me to do so. I gave him mine and hypenated it with his as well. That is always option.
Hope this helps.
Michele
I know someone that was unmarried when they had baby number 2. She was married when her first child was born, so he has his fathers name and when they divorced she kept the sons last name. Almost 14 years later she had a second child. The father and her have no intentions of getting married. She was told that the father needed to fill out an acknowledgement of paternity form. Without the form, if the parents are unmarried, the child will automatically be given the mother's last name. They filled out the appropriate form; however, she wanted the child to have hers and her sons last name. She felt like it would be easier on the child once she started school and less questions to her. She was advised by an attorney that if the father would be paying child support that he could demand that his daughter have his last name. Thankfully for her, he was in agreement to allow his daughter to have hers and her son's last name. I hope that this helps.
The people who said they contacted the attorney have the right idea, if you have the time contact legal aide. If they are not on good terms and will not be having a chance of a future relationship then it is understandable the baby NOT having his last name, but if she is going to want to collect Child Support which she should then she may have to list his name on the Birth Certificate. If they are going their seperate ways this would be the best option, that way if he denies C/S then it will be easier for the state to go after him to collect. My sister had her 1st at 15, she listed the father as "Unknown" the baby has our last (maiden) name, she is now 24, at 18 she started looking for her father, she found him and it was not all she thought it was going to be. That is something else to....will your step daughter want to keep this information from the child as the child gets older, or will there be a relationship with the bio-dad? The last name is not the only issue, and if you had a crystal ball things would be alot easier!!!! Good luck and try to seek legal advice as soon as possible.
The child will recieve the mothers last name unless she signs a waiver stating the father and her are common law married.
As for pros/cons, there really are none. Its just a name.
Either one. My daughter wasn't married to my grandsons father either. He messed around on her & she split from him the week before they were to get married & she had just learned she was pregnant 2 weeks prior to that. He agreed to let baby have his last name only as long as child looked like him otherwise baby would have hers.
He didn't even come to the birth because they were/are still feuding. He sent his adopted mom w/ a picture of him at 6 mths old to compare w/ the baby which looked exactly like him! Now he has features like both but then he looked exactly lke him. He only came the night before they were to go home, she had a c-section, & stayed 20 minutes!
But baby can have either last name.
There's no real guideline on that. It's really up to the individual personality of the judge but my experience in the last 20 years is the father's name will be preferred if he is involved. If there is any way for them to talk it through with a counselor or parent coordinator, they should try that. They would have the benefit of a neutral child specialist for setting schedules etc. and discussing things like the last name and have more control. Janet Denton
Wow, theres a lot of conflicting advice on here huh?
When I had my child we weren't on great terms either. I by choice gave her my last name, however, the nurse told me I could have put whatever last name I wanted. I wanted to list him as father on the birth certificate regardless of the name, but they won't let that happen unless he is there to sign it. Therefore the father section was left blank.
I work at a hospital with postpartum patients. In Texas, you can give your child any last name you want. Father's, mother's, grandmother's...Texas doesn't care. It is up to whoever fills out the birth certificate.
I'm agreeing w/ those about the child having the mothers last name. I was not married when I had my first child 11 years ago, I put the father on the birth certificate, but b/c he was not there and did not fill out the paperwork - her birth certificate was blank under "Father". I gave her my last name, b/c she was a part of my family - I wanted her to have the last name of the family she was being raised by.
In my opinion, to children the last name can feel important. A few years later, I married a man who was not my daughters biological father. We had 3 boys and they all had my husbands last name, as did I when I married him. My dd always knew she was part of the family, my husband has raised her since she was 18 months old, as we tell the boys "your sister was here first" - and in her concious memory, my husband has always been daddy to her. They are "thick as theives" as they say. But when we'd get gifts that said "To the _________ Family" - she'd often feel sort of sad, or left out b/c she had a different last name. She hated when she was in sports and her last name was different than the rest of the family. While she is very secure in her realtionship in our family, she still felt left out. It took us some time to come up w/ the money, but in 2005 my husband adopted her and her last name was changed to his. It was amazing how much of a difference that meant to her! She is so proud of her last name now! She is so proud to have the same last name as her siblings and her daddy.
I realize it's just a name, and not all kids are that way, but personally, I'd hate having the last name of parent I did not know (if that ends up being the case in your stepdaughters relationship).
If he does not fill out paperwork, he will not be listed as the father on the birth certificate. She could give the child the father's last name, but if there is not a good relationship, it's my personal opinion it would be better to give the child her last name so the child always feels that "family" connection.
The last name has no effect on child support. The child's last name could be Santa Claus and it wouldn't matter. If she goes after him for child support (b/c he is unwilling or disappears) - then he may protest paternity, and he will be required to take a paternity test, at his expense (he'll have to reimburse the state). I would just make sure she knows his social security number if you predict a negative outcome about their relationship.
Good luck to her!
If she is planning on collecting child support I would contact a family law attorney about the last name issue before she has the baby.
If she doesn't want child support from him, then she can give the baby her last name without listing him as the father. This would not keep the father from coming around at any point saying he wants to share the baby.
God forbid something happens to your daughter, he would be the one that would become the legal gaurdian if he made it known that the baby was his.
She can have a will made up that states in the event of her death she would like so-in-so to be considered for the baby's legal gaurdian. Unless the birth father doesn't want the baby or there's a huge reason that the baby should not go to him (such as being on drugs or something else horrible in his lifestyle~something you have 'proof' about)then he will become the legal gaurdian in the event of her death.
You can choose the last name you want to give the child. I have a son, and gave him his father's last name. I felt it was important for him to have that link to his father, even if he wasn't around often. I wanted him to know who he his. He lives with me so he will always have that.
Additionally, my parents divorced when I was young and my mother remarried. Like someone else mentioned, I did feel bad that my last name didn't match everyone else's in the house. Now that I'm older, I am glad I still have my father's last name. It's who I am. I am a part of him, and whether our relationship is good or bad, that's just the way it is. (smile) It helps me to embrace all of who I am.
I'm sure your step-daughter will make the decision that's right for her family. Pray about it! :)
My step daughter gave her baby the daddy's name. I think it was so it would be easier to get child support if it came down to it.
You can choose what name they get. I think you can even make it up! (Not sure, but I think... :))
She will get to choose the baby's last name. And the father will not be listed on the birth certificate unless he is there to sign. I chose to have my children carry my last name because when they are in school it causes less confusion and I do not have to correct them and tell them I have a different last name.
Texas Department of Health
Bureau of Vital Statistics
PO Box 12040, Austin, Texas 78711-2040
Telephone (512)458-7111
You need contact the heath dept to find out what the law states. Most states DO NOT allow you to give a child a another person's last name if they DO NOT CONSENT, meaning the father has to be at the birth to sign to say "this is my child".
I just recently moved to TX. so I can only speak for the east coast, but in MD DC and VA even if a couple is married and the man is not there to sign the documents acknowledging paternity, the child is automatically given the mothers last name, regardless of martial status.
hi julie. i just had my son two months ago and i am not married to his father. in fact i have two boys now by the same man and we are not married. two months ago when i had my second born i filled out the birth certificate and my common law husband thats what I call him signed his name on the birth certificate. this gave my son his last name. lets say worst case scenario he wasn't there for us. then the lady who helped me fill it out told me i would just put my last name as his last name. and if i ever had to put child support on him that there was a number on the paperwork so i could proceed with that. of course in that case a dna test would proceed and then once it was proven then he would liable for the child. understand? i hope this helps.