I am a mother of twin boys who are autistic. Hair cuts are the devil. I was wondering if anyone had any useful tips on how to make hair cuts go smoother. My boys are so sensitive to somethings that it is just unbearable at times.
I have given my two youngest boys haircuts at home. I just use a pair of clippers like you would get at walmart. There was just so much anxiety and acting up at the barbar or beauty shop that it was traumatic for everyone involved!
So, we just put a chair in the middle of the kitchen floor and they can watch tv or whatever makes them happy. This way you arent out in public having an episode and trying to hurry. YOu can take your time and let them have thier fit or do what they need to do to get thru the excitement of a haircut. Plus, you can stop anytime you want and their arent other customers waiting for you to finish. I have had times where I had to try 3 times to get my youngest son to let me finish his haircut...that wouldnt work at the beauty shop! HOpe this helps!
Hi Katie,
I am a music therapist and have worked with many autistic children around age 2-4 years (mainly in the Atlanta GA early intervention program). This issue has come up with every single mom! In regards to going out, in Atlanta (we just moved here so I'm not sure what is here), there are a few Salons that are only for kids, and some were better then others. But the main thing the moms and families I worked with said was to call these salons (these are the ones with the TV's/DVD players/toys/etc) and see if anyone has any experience with autistic childen/cutting their hair. You would be suprised how many Child Hair Cutting Salons do have experience with this! Also, the stylists in Atlanta would make a special time for these kids (usually early in the morning) where its just them in the salon to help with the overstimulation issues. You might also try some pretend play with your sons prior to going to a haircutting place or for if you want to cut their hair at home, such as get out the playdough scissors, make playdough hair, and go to town cutting it, or if they have some boy toys that you can create "pretend" hair. You might also talk to some other moms and families with children with autism/spectrum. I just moved to St. Louis recently so I havent gotten to know the local sites for this area! Hope this helps a little. Feel free to email me if you have any other questions!
Rachael
I used to cut hair for all ages, including young children. Can't say any of them were autistic, but active. Some hints we were giving is to bring them in sleeping, or just before nap time (when they are tired and less active)...I used to do my best to cut hair when they were brought to me active and have the parents hold them (many mothers would force the issue more than I did), but I do know some stylist won't cut their hair when they won't sit still cause they are too worried about the child getting injured from either getting cut or poked with the scissors (if used), and often times the sound of the clippers scares them. I think you just need to find a stylist that knows how to deal with young kids and has experience in talking them through their haircuts. If you can find a regular stylist, the children can get used to him/her and look forward to seeing her with each new haircut, as well as not be so scared each time because they will learn what to expect for both the process and the stylist.
Good luck!
My younger brother is autistic. He is very high functioning. Since my father was useless during our upbringing, I did and still do provide a significant portion of his care. When he was younger, we distracted him during haircuts with a snak that he liked, or his "lovey" (his favorite cuddle toy) I don't know if you have looked, but Barnes & Noble has some amazing books and tips and advise to learning, understanding, and coping with Autistic children. They are in the parenting section under Children with special needs. There's even books called "1001 Great Ideas for Teaching or Raising Children with Autism Spectrum Disorders" and "100 Questions & Answers About Autism: Expert Advice from a Physician/Parent Caregiver" that have proved very helpful, and are reader friendly to the distracted mom. Hopefully you get some help from these. If you need any more help or want to know where to look for more books.... Let me know. On a sentimental note, even though your sons are going to be a major trial in your life. You have no idea the gifts you have in store. Treasure your sons with every fiber of your being. I have spent most of my life volunteering and working with children who have special needs. Same of which have been placed in homes and forgotten. Every one of them are my kids. These people are precious. Never will you find a human who remains that near to pureness. I find an amazing peace with them. They truly are gifts from God. I'd keep them all if I could. You have me a misty. Remember you can never appreciate the rose without the thorny stem from which it blooms. Good Luck hon.
I give my 2 year old a sucker while I give him a hair cut. I make it clear to him that I will take it away if he doesn't sit nice. I don't know if this would work for an autistic child.
I have a 2 year old also and I have found that letting him eat a sucker while i am cutting his hair really makes him focus on that and not what i am doing. He gets a little messy but he washes!
I have a friend who is a cosmotalagist and she is currently working for SuperCuts in Broken Arrow. She not only cuts all my family's hair but one of my co-workers' daughters, the youngest of her two girls is also autistic and Hannah (my friend) has done a wonderful job of cutting her hair. Hannah is GREAT with kids and a very understanding and patient person. So if you don't mind going to Broken Arrow she would be a great solution. If you think you'd like to try let me know and I'll get you in touch with her, so you will know when she is at work.
I agree with the advice of doing it at home. It's much less stressful. My daughter was actually fascinated when I held her in one arm and cut her hair with the other hand. She was up high enough that she could watch in the mirror, and of course, she was in a familiar position -- being held by Mom. Good luck!
Mary Ellen
I heard a good tip once about children and haircuts: don't refer to it as a hairCUT. Especially when they are little because they think it is going to hurt if they are going to get their hair CUT! It may help to tell them, "Let's go get your hair done!" Or "We're going to the salon/barber so we can make your hair look pretty/handsome!" Just a tip that worked wonders for us--we took our 2 1/2 year old for his first official haircut at the salon this past weekend. (I've just been doing minor trimwork until now, but his hair has gotten too long and thick for me to maintain anymore!)
Have your boys sit in your lap while he is getting his hair cut.
Just my thought.
Hi Katie!
I have a son with Aspergers and haircuts used to be a nightmare. I hope it gets better, it did somewhat for my son. I cut his hair myself in the tub and tried to make a game of it. Do your boys have sensory integration issues? My son does. He had to almost be physically restrained for a cut one time and I said no, this is not good, enough is enough. Now he goes infrequently and if I can, I get him a buzz cut so they are less frequent. He doesn't like them but being able to have the hair wet for the cut helps and getting immediately in the shower to wash off helps too. He was also very afraid of it so I spent a lot of time telling him how hair can't feel anything etc etc.
Are you registered with the regional center or mental health department? Do you have them in the parents as teachers and first steps programs? Do you have them in occupational therapy? The earlier you can start these things the better. Also, I found that the Little Gym and other interactive things really really help. Swimming too.
Let me know if I can help any more. There is a good list online in yahoo groups called the a-list too.
Best to you,
Lisa
I just gave my son with Autism a hair cut today and then later read your request. I will say that it was a meltdown experience and I completely understand where you are coming from. It helps for him to watch a movie while getting his hair cut. He did have the words to tell me that the buzzing was scary and that the hair was scratchy and that he did not like it. I have always cut it at home. It does help if Daddy goes first to model. Side note** the gluten-free diet made a huge difference in my son. Will provide more information if you would like, or feel free to ask me about anything else.
I don't know if anyone has mentioned this yet, but there is a new place called Snip-Its. There is one on 240 and Penn next to the new Payless and Old Navy. It is only for kids and they can watch cartoons when they are done, get a treat, and so on. Now, this may over stimulate them. I have an autistic girl in my class and she gets over stimulated and upset when there is too much noise.
I don't know if this will help, but my son was "borderline" autistic/not autistic (what that means is now they think he has Asperberger's syndrome)....and when he was little I just let his hair get kinda long and then when I took him I held him on my lap with my arms around him and would sing songs to him. He was still upset, but the songs helped. Also, my son was hypersensitive to cold and wet things...so I either wet his hair down with warm water after we got there or we just dry cut him. Just by going back to the same lady who understood and sitting in the same seat and having our routine it helped those first 3 years.
I have 4 year old twin daughters. They are not identical and I can only imagine how hard it was to get your boys here. I hope you have a great support system....it was and still is extremely hard. If you ever want to discuss twins or whatever give me a call 9182572224
Hi Katie
My son also has sensory problems and hair cuts have always been difficult. I cut it myself and I just use sissors because the buzzer is too noisy for him. One issue for him is the way the hair feels when it falls from his head. For that I wrap a towel around him and I gave him a big soft make up brush to use to brush away any hair from his face that bothers him( I cut it dry). When he was younger I also would hit garage sales and store things to bring out as a special treat during the hair cut.( yes I bribed him) I would let him hold it during the cut and when he was finnished he could play with it. Good luck, Connie B.
I AM A MOTHER OF TWIN GIRLS THEY ARE 22 WILL BE 23 IN FEB, THEY BOTH ARE AUTISTIC, THEY ARE SO SPECIAL...... THEY ALWAYS LOVED GETTING HAIR CUTS,,, I THINK IT IS A BOY THING !!!! I HAVE TWO BOYS ALSO,, AND I ALSO CUT HAIR TO,,,, SORRY, THERE IS NO EASY WAY,,,,,,, LEA
My nephew is autistic and I asked my sister-in-law about your request. Here is what she had to say.
http://www.autism-pdd.net/forum/
This is another great forum for parents with autistic kids. Here is some advice I can offer:
First- The sensory issues these kids go through can be very hard especially when they are hygienic issues. Hair cuts are a biggy and many kids have the same issue. I would suggest not using the clippers(the sound)- scissors only and have someone do it that has patience and time.
If you have a friend or family member that cuts hair and is willing and patient it might help to have them come to the house. The strange atmosphere of a salon might be too much.
Second- Don't plan on doing it all at once. Make it an all day thing or if possible extend it to a second day. This might drive you crazy but it keeps it from being traumatic. Once they seem to be heading to overload then stop. This keeps it from being that scary thing that Mom or Dad holds them down for!
Last- If they will let you hold them do. Just don't make it too uncomfortable. For some kids you can entertain them with a favorite toy that they can concentrate on.
That is the best I can advise.
Sherri
Hey there. Hair cuts are hell for me to. But it does help to have someone they know well to cut their hair. If you have a friend, aunt, or relative. Also, suckers aren't on Elijah's diet but he stays still with a sucker. Good Luck! God Bless you.
hello to all
ok so as a mom of a 4 y/o with SPD/autism (Josh) and as a barber i can simply tell you...
if you are forcing your kid to get a haircut, restraining or even holding him in your legs stop don't do it any more.
as soon as your kid shows you discomfort you should stop because cutting hair to kids that have SPD is process
it wont happen over night... why because its about the kid getting over all those sounds and feelings that create discomfort
and the most important thing is to build the trust that getting a haircut is not torture is just like therapy... lets face it all of us want our kids to be independent
for them to be able to walk in to a hair salon or a barbershop and pick a hair cut.. why?? because is part of life and we all want our kid to have an independent life
so it takes lots of patience and time is not over night and every kid is different all the kids that have SPD that i have cut their hair have taking different approach
so please just for a sec go back in time when you were a kid.. and think of the one vegetable that your were force to eat and hate to the point of nausea.... can you eat it now? do you like it? probably not... so forcing a haircut will only take you to the same place.