Do you travel without your kids? What's the furthest you've gone from them? How long were you away? Did things go well with them while you were gone?
We did some but not much. Grandparents would come to stay with the kids. We tried to rotate grandparents. One time, my folks, next time in-laws. We didn’t live by anyone so if we had a trip, we had to plan in advance. Generally 4 to 5 days.
The longest was 10 days when our oldest was in HS. Hubby and I went to Northern California (Napa, SF) for my college graduation/anniversary. Grandparents stayed with them.
Since both kids are gone, we travel a lot more. We have been to London twice and Paris once, also went to Rome last year. Yay!!! Going to LA in April!!! Big yay!!
My husband and I traveled a few years ago without the kids. My mom came and stayed at the house with them while we were gone. She wasn’t the best choice, but everything turned out OK. I probably wouldn’t travel without a baby who is still breastfeeding. My mom ran out of pumped milk because she fed him whenever he cried instead of trying other soothing methods. So he ate 50% more than he normally would and she freaked out that she ran out… Now that my kids are 4 and 7, I would feel very comfortable travelling for a week or so and leaving the boys with family or close friends.
When we did travel, we went to Vegas, about a 6 hour drive from home, for 4 days.
We went to Hawaii and had a great time. We only had 2 kids at the time and they stayed with my parents. I guess my parents didn’t like having them stay for 7 days so that was the first and last time the kids stayed with their grandparents other than when I was having my last 2 kids. The kids were well cared for and had a great time but it was hard because my parents were both working full time and had more adjusting then they thought they’d have to do.
Yes we did. Our daughter is 20 now. Just because we had a child did not mean we put our lives on hold until she grew up. That wouldn’t be fair to her. She has enjoyed many trips with us as well.
We would travel mostly for business but stay a couple of days longer or so for personal fun. We are in a Plastics Organization and go to the conference each spring and fall. Typically the Spring conferences are the most fun and enjoyable locations… San Diego, Palm Springs, Pebble Beach, Pinehurst, Tampa, Amelia Island, FL to name a few.
We do not have family living close by and the sitters I used for our weekly date night were sisters and neighbors so they would sleepover and get daughter to/from school. At the time, they were in high school and they lived walking distance from my house so their mom was also close by. It worked out well for us and well for them because they were well paid. I also had my pet sitter come in separately to make sure pets were taken care of well.
When daughter was 16, she stayed home and ran the house while we were gone, got to school on her own and took care of the pets. We paid her what we would pay our pet/house sitter to do that job.
I think it is good to get away once in a while. Parents can recharge, children have an adventure and it works well for everyone.
We’ve traveled a few times without kids (or with on kid–leaving the other two behind). Each time it was far enough to fly. Fortunately, we have 2 sets of fantastic grandparents that are happy to watch them. The two longest trips were 1 week to St. Maarten (this was last year and the kids were 8, 6, 3) and 3 weeks to Boston. The Boston trip was a special circumstance. We took my middle child there for open heart surgery. His brothers went to my in-laws’ house in FL (it was summer break).
Yes, we travel without our kids. The furthest away I have gone is to Hawaii from the east coast. We were away for 10 days. We frequently go for weekend/extended weekend get aways.
Did things go well - that depends on who is watching them If it’s my MIL, things go very well. If it’s my mother - it’s a crap shoot. The kids are fine, but my mother ends up exhausted, run down, and a lot of things don’t get done because she can’t follow directions.
Travelling sans child is AMAZING. You can just sit in the airport and READ or do nothing. You do not have to entertain. There is no cat herding. You can sleep on the plane. Or not. Or read. I never realized what a luxury travel is by oneself (and yes, it is so much more miserable than it used to be, I get that). My husband has always taken care of DS when I travel and I have always taken care of DS when DH travels. So it always goes just fine. I have flown about 1000 miles away. DH has flown across the country without DS. The longest I have been away was almost a month when my dad was dying.
The longest we’ve been away is just over a week. Furthest we’ve gone is Alaska, on a cruise. The kids have a blast with their grandparents and we really enjoy the special time just for us when we’ve gone away. It’s always been a win-win.
Book that one-on-one time now!
ETA: I see from another post that you have a special needs child. All the more important to give yourselves a break! Our son has a long list of brain disorders and it’s exhausting. Having the special time with my husband has allowed us to return home ready to take on the challenges again. Marriages can easily get strained with special needs kids (I’m sure you’ve heard the divorce stats here), so it’s critical to have the time alone together.
Absolutely! Did Europe last summer for about 5 days, and will do it again this spring for about 10 days. We fly MIL out to stay with the kids. She loves it, they love it, and appreciate us when we come back! I always type up a schedule/agenda/menu suggestions and have foods in the house they all like. I print driving directions, give her all of the emergency contact info and have neighbors and friends check in. Everything has always gone smoothly!
And we have a fantastic, adults-only, peaceful vacation. Winning all around!
WE could never travel without our kids becuase we didn’t have people who could take care of them and take them where they needed to go. My mother was vision imparied and in poor health when my kids were young, and my inlaws were very oveweight and could not be counted on to get them up, take them where they needed to be, feed them and get them to bed a decent hours. The very few times we used my mom or my inlaws for a few hours here and there we had things that just weren’t great (my daughter telling us that her little brother nearly got hit by a car when he darted across a parking lot and no one was paying attention to him, the kids still up at 1 AM when we got home from a wedding by my inlaws out cold in the recliner and couch, my mom calling because she couldnt’ figure out how to heat up their dinner, etc.)
the most we were able to do was spend a weekend away when my sister was able to take our kids - but based on her work schedule that was an anomoly.
So - if you have healthy grandparents who will keep your kids safe,a nd your kids love spending time with them, then go! If you’re concerned about homework and school schedules try to do it around school vacation or a long weekend.
Of course! My kids are older now, 12 and 15, but we have gone on trips and my kids have gone on trips with my mom when they were younger. I think the longest was for about 2 weeks when they went to CA with my mom when they were about 3 and 7. My husband is in sales and so when he qualified for a trip (usually 4 days) the kids would either stay with my mom or my ex when we were gone. They always had a fun adventure and of course we liked the break. Nothing bad ever happened.
We’ve gone a few hours’ drive away from DD and farther from the sks (they were with their mother when we went to FL alone, for example). Each trip was between 1 and 6 nights.
Things were fine. My DD was with my mom, and if my mom didn’t have to work, I bet she would have been happy to keep DD longer. I think it is good for DD to see that we are more than just Mom and Dad sometimes. And good for us, too.
I’ve been on about a half dozen business trips, Los Angeles, Tuscon, Lexington, Cleveland, Toronto. Each lasted about 4-6 days. My kid is 4 years old. While I am gone, hubs takes care of him. It goes fairly well.
We have never had an overnight together without kiddo. I would jump at the opportunity, but we’ve no one lined up for now. In a few short years sleep away summer camp becomes an option and we might sleep and sleep in.
Best,
fanged bunny
All the time. 5 days - only because we don’t think it’s fair to ask our parents to sit for longer than that - and all over Europe, not to mention here in the states.
We’d go nuts if we couldn’t do things like that. It’s what we’ve always done, even before kids. So we never thought twice about keeping it up - even when they were babies. My son had his first weekend away from us when he was 6 weeks old.
We never looked back.
I do travel from time to time without my kids, but the last few years it has been only me and they have been home with their father. The only time we traveled together without them was when we were living near London and left them with trusted friends for a long weekend in Paris. Things went just fine, they had fun playing with our friends kids, and the trip gave us a much needed chance to reconnect.
Yes! I travel more often than my husband because I’m a teacher and have more time off, but we travel together without the kids, too. We don’t get to do this as often as we’d like, but we enjoy it when we can. Last spring we spent 5 days in Boston and drove up to Maine - we’re in Texas. We’ve been to Florida, the Bahamas, and Mexico without them, too, and other places that aren’t as far.
Now our oldest is 17 and he takes care of our 10 year old when we travel - we’re going on a weekend trip next weekend - but when they were younger my parents were happy to keep them. They’re really easy kids.
It’s important to take time for yourself and for your marriage. We’re celebrating our 21st anniversary next weekend and one reason I think we have been so happy is because we make our marriage a priority.
I usually prefer to travel with my kids because they are fun and I miss them when I’m away. But DH and I have done some 3 day trips without them which were great. We’ve gone without them about once a year. 4 days (3 nights) is just the right amount of time IMO. We’ve gone close by to a resort, we’ve gone across the country, and we’ve gone out of the country (Caribbean).
I have gone on required 7 day trips for work but DH was home with the kids and even then I didn’t like it because by day 4 I really miss them and want to be home.
The kids are always totally fine when I’m gone. I miss them far more than they miss me it seems!
We went to Vegas for a week without them. Otherwise we just do the occasional weekend or overnight getaway We don’t travel much, and when we do it’s usually a family vacation. Things have always gone well.
Hi
We have traveled without kids for about 5 days total, but were always able to get back ASAP - which is my requirement. I could not go anywhere that was too remote to get back in a pinch.
Usually we have just gone for a long weekend getaway - either with friends or just the two of us to reconnect. It really is worth it. When we can’t get away for extended periods, we go for a night to an inn that we can drive to. Even a night away, with a meal, and a nice breakfast/brunch the next day and a little sight seeing is awesome.
It really depends who you have to look after your kids. We’ve had family come here and look after them which worked out the best for us. The kids’ routines were not changed very much, and I was able to have as much prepared ahead of time to help out the grandparents and keep it consistent.
It is a bit of a challenge for older people. So having meals prepared and even clothing laid out by day (especially if there’s a gym day or uniforms required) helps out. I don’t want my mother or MIL wondering what they should do - it’s too stressful for them. It’s much easier if you have it fool proof for them. That way they can just relax at least part of the time and enjoying visiting with the grandkids.
I babysat a lot as a teenager and early 20’s for families for long weekends, etc. And I had my mother as backup. If you do go that route, make sure the sitter’s parent is available in an emergency. I was trained for emergencies (had worked at daycares and summer camps) - even so teenagers can become overwhelmed. Knowing my mother was a quick call away and she could be there in a few minutes made me and the parents feel a lot more secure.
My brother and wife left their babies with my mother and went to Europe. They had a great time. My mother I know couldn’t relax the whole time they were gone. She kept it to herself but I could tell. If anything happened to the babies, she knew she would have to make decisions before they would be able to get back in time. That’s quite an expectation to put on someone so make sure that’s something they can handle. My mother was prepared to do that, but it’s something to consider.
If you feel confident in who you leave them with - it’s a wonderful opportunity to have some alone time away from all the hassles of home