Seeking Gift Ideas for Friend Diagnosed with Breast Cancer

I have a friend who has been diagnosed with breast cancer. She is having a mastectomy next week and I am looking for thoughtful gift ideas to provide for her over the next few weeks. She is in her 50's. I would much appreciate the help.

Our church does prayer quilts (lap size). One of the ladies in our church choir, was given a prayer quilt and she said that she loved it, since she could take it with her to the hospital for chemo or sitting at home watching tv. It took care of her while she was having chills. So it doesn't have to be a prayer quilt, but a lap size quilt, might be nice.

If you aren't already, cook dinner for her and her family. Don't offer unwanted advice medically or otherwise. Be an ear and be a friend. Take a great chick flick and share it with her when she is home recuperating.

My Mom needed button down shirts that were easier to put on and take off after surgery since she couldn't raise her arms up very high. This could be cotton casual shirts or even button down pjs.

My mom had her surgery this week. Ditto to the button front shirts, as someone suggested. My mom had to go get button front pjs at the last minute, because she forgot about clothes for sleeping. Also, my mom has really enjoyed books and lectures on tape/cd because she's too tired to read or too sick from chemo to focus on the words. But she's bored and the books on tape have been fun for her. I got her some funny lectures about having kids and stuff like that. I'm not sure how close you are with your friend, but she'll probably have a "drain" after surgery for a time period and she may not be comfy with you visiting her while it's in.
Best of luck to her.

A friend of mine was 32 years old when she had her mastectomy. I got her a pair of those fuzzy socks, and I got me a pair. And I switched one of each. That way we each had one of each pair, and we matched. Kinda corny, but it was something personal. Plus it was practical and not expensive.

Write her a card telling her what she means to you and how strong of a woman she is. Remind her she is still a wonderful and beautiful women. She's not really interested in gifts right now I would bet, but surviving. Being her friend and being there for her is a biggie. Another thing I did right before her surgery, I took her picture. (with her permission of course) It will be a remind later of where she was, and where she is then. Again, another personal touch.

I think the moms who wrote from personal experience had the best ideas, and I appreciate their input, since I also have a friend recently diagnosed.

My friend lives in another state, and I think I'm going to send her a Pashmina I found in a Room Service Home catalog for $19. I'm hoping the beautiful color will cheer her up and give her a "hug" from us every time she wears it.

roomservicehome.com

Another idea would be a button down bed jacket that she could wear in bed, over her PJs (and it would also be nice to have in the hospital).

http://www.nextag.com/bed-jacket/search-html

Other ideas:

http://www.findgift.com/Categories/Special-Themes/Special-Causes/Breast-Cancer/

http://www.healingbaskets.com/cancer.htm

God bless you and your friend.

Here are my ideas...
1. Start a Carecalender(on the web) its totally free. You set up a calender for friends and family to sign up to bring meals, do errands, etc.
2. Treat her to a fabulous girls day at the spa. With facials, pedicures,lunch and whatever you think she will like.
3. Write her a special card telling you how you feel about your friendship.
4. You can get her some nice body products like soap and body lotion, body scrub and make a spa basket. Her skin will probally be dry and sensitive.

When my mom's best friend had cancer surgery, the thing she appreciated the most was the cleaning service my mom arranged to clean her house for a couple months after surgery. She said it was so nice not to have to worry about cleaning dishes, floors, & clothes while recuperating. If you can't pay for someone to go in to clean, maybe you could arrange with some other friends to take turns helping out around her house.

those edible fruit bouquets are great....they are happy and she gets to eat something healthy.
My mom liked having really big t-shirts to sleep in when she was going through all of that.

I would suggest a nice Custom SPA gift basket. I have made them before for just this cause. I put slippers, bathrobe, 2 pc pajamas with button front for ease of on/off, some gourmet Teas and cup, Gift card for some movies or services she needs, a Candle, some lotion, shampoo and conditioner.. in custom personalized bottles, her favorite novel and custom stationary... some beautiful things to make her feel special and beautiful!

Hope that gives you an idea...
APril J
www.celebritypartyfavors.com

I found that I liked to be reminded of things other than my cancer when I was going through it. My kids were still in elementary school, so that was pretty easy to be diverted by them, but a 50 yr old won't have that. I think uplifting movies would be a great thing. Don't get too fixated on the hospital part of things. I really only needed the PJ's for a couple of days. Instead, maybe you could get her a new pair of sneakers so you could go for short walks. Exercise was a great way to get my energy up. Also, Epsom Salts in the tub (once her incision heals) was fantastic for pulling toxins out of the body, plus it's cheap. Focus on her other interests instead of keeping her stuck in the "cancer victim/survivor" mode. Mostly, just keep in touch with her and share opinions about the rest of the world. When you deal with any serious illness, the world seems to shrink, and it's nice to have others remind you that you have a lot of life left. I can tell you are a great friend, and she's lucky to have you!

From my experience, I could not have made it without my friends, since I have no family here. I wasn't hungry but appreciated meals for my family. The gift of time is very appreciated. Many people offered to help "in any way" but some showed up saying I have 2 hours free, what can I do for you?, go to the store, throw in some laundry. I had a good friend who was a nurse. She came and helped with drains (you come home with them post surgery). As a non medical person I didn't feel like I knew what I was doing. Chick flicks, a good book, socks, soft loose fitting lounging wear, anything you would get for any surgical patient. If your friend is having chemo she will need scarfs and hats, which she won't want to spend $ on. Most ladies I've met can't concentrate on projects, or crafts, reading. or any of the things we think we would do if we had some time off, while going thru chemo.
You might offer to take her to a breast cancer support group.
Most of the major hospitals have them. Mine meets at Medical Center of Plano, 3rd Monday of each month 7 pm. It's a wonderful group, very informative and fun. Like a special club
you never pictured yourself being a part of. It was the little things for me. My husband made me pudding, a mum was left on my porch, a friend gave me a pedicure. All the best to you and your friend!

Perhaps a low-maintenance plant?

If she is a Christian, a holding cross is great. It's a wooden cross that fits perfectly in the palm. It's very soothing.

Dianna,
I have found this great website www.carepages.com. Friends of a Friend, set her up a carepage when she began her battle with Breast Cancer. Just last week, there was a newsletter sent out with 27 gift ideas, the list was fantastic. It is way to long to post here. If you would like me to send you a copy of it, just send me a message with your email address and I will forward it to you.
Carepages is a great place to set up a webpage where others can post well wishes to your friend and she can also update people all at once.
Hope this helps
Mayr

Spiritual books of positive nature and having someone come in and clean her house one day would be great- A nice homecooked meal- get friends and neighbors involved. Play scrabble wth her and keep her comapny one night just being there is a true gift. -B4 u leave her house- pop a thoughtful message quote on a mirror that she;ll see after you leave- a nice positive surprise and thoughtful gesture.

Darlene

A firend of mine recently gifted her friend fighting breast cancer with a gift card to Sam Moon Jewelry for some fun, fabulous and yet inexpensive hats, scarves and even hair pieces! It was great!

Dianna H

There is an organization, Cleaning for a Reason. Contact them and they will set up your friends house being cleaned once a month, for 4 months, for "FREE", while she is going through her cemo. cleaningforareason.org We have cleaning companies participating all over the US I don't know the area you live in. I know this because I have a cleaning company and I am proud to partner with cleaning for a reason.

Judy R --- also a wife, mom, Nana and friend

I got a catalog the other day called Catalog Favorites.There was a ring, a thin cuff bracelet and a pendant,they were in stainless steel.They have a quote on all that says----What cancer cannot do--"invade the soul,supress memories,kill friendship,destroy peace,conquer the spirit,shatter hope,cripple love,corrode faith,steal eternal life,silence courage." When I saw this I knew I wanted to buy this for my friend who just got through non-hodgkins lymphoma.This week I was diagnosed with colon cancer and will buy myself one to remind me too what cancer cannot do! The website: catalogfavorites.com 1-800-221-1133 they have from beautiful to silly in their catalog---check it out! :) SANDY B