Hello mamas. I really need some advice on how to go about handling my daughter who is 18 and living at home. She is a responsible person who has a part-time job, has her own car, and will be entering junior college this fall, and is EXTREMELY sociable. She lives at home with my husband and I, but we are having trouble where she is putting her social life as a priority. We had set her curfew at 1 a.m. on weekends while she was a senior, but now that she is out of high school and on summer vacation, she is coming home from parties, or get togethers between 1 a.m. and 1:30 a.m just about every night! I set my alarm to wake me up at 1:15 a.m. just to make sure she is home. I worry because she is not doing anything good at these parties. She enjoys drinking alcohol (but doesnt not drink and drive.) and also notice she likes pot too. I've caught her high a couple of times. She likes to go out a lot and rarely likes to bring her friends over because she says her friends would want to drink and since I don't allow it in my home, then she rather be at a friends house who do allow it, or parents are not home. I worry and I don't like her behavior and wish she could focus on college. My husband said just to let her do her thing, because she just graduated HS and is in an euphoria state. He says in the Fall when college begins that she will have a full load of classes and that will hopefully put her focus more on school, and if not, then he will make sure to switch her focus to school. I also worry about her drinking and pot smoking. Any ideas how to help her get away from that? My daughter is the type of person who will not take NO for an answer and will battle with me. She wants her freedom so badly and resents she has to live at home still because she cannot afford to move out. She is a young adult and we've given her more freedom. We've brought her up in a strict environment within reason. Her friends parents are lienient and don't really have curfews for their daughters which doesn't help my case.
I don't want my daughter coming home every night at 1 a.m. every night. It's bad enough that she is out every night. I don't think being out every night is a good thing. What would you do? Should I put a limit on how many nights she can come home at 1 a.m.? I feel she treats our home like a hotel/restaurant and hardly ever spends time with her dad and me, but I guess that is normal for a person her age. I need guidance on how to handle this situation so any advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you so much!!